Drama-nessy, Bench Theatre-Appreciationy, Looking aheady, Slightly delirious with tirednessy chit-chatty...

Wow. It's offical. I'm the worst blogger going...
Thing is, when I started blogging, I was determined that I was only going to write about my views on things, anything I felt like talking about that came into my head or about anything exciting that had happened and that I wouldn't just turn it into a 'virtual diary' type thing, in which I just write about crap, like what I had for dinner, how I've styled my hair and other boring information that quite frankly, even I wouldn't want to write about!

Sooooo with that little speech given, I should be going on to write about something amazing and inspirational with life - changing views and all kinds of drama, however due to a particularly exciting bench after show party (which resulted in a 5 am finish and 8.45 am wakeup)...I'm feeling slightly (and a bit more than usual) brain-mushed, so please forgive me, I'm plannning on getting through today in a zombie like state.

I've been thinking a lot about what I want to do recently. I had a bit of drama a couple of weeks back when I decided I didnt like my uni course, I was all set to walk out and get a work aprenti-wotsit,  however I think this was due to over-tiredness and slight stress, However i'm now back on track with it all and loving it again, which is a huge relief as I wasn't entirely sure what I was going to do if I did just leave. Whenever people ask me what I want to do when I'm older, I always say 'Something Drama-y'...which is kinda obvious I guess...however what I really want to be...lets be perfectly honest...is an actress. Either on television or in movies, I just love the whole idea of it and find it extremely exciting. However I understand that this is not an easy option. I know lots of people are very critical when it comes to performing arts and wanting to be in that kind of career...and I also understand it's not at all easy to get into...also the fact that I have never wanted to be seen as one of those showy-offy, slightly delusional "Oh yes i'm gonna be a famous actress and live in a mansion with Johnny Depp and everyone will love me and wahh wahh wahh" types means I watch what I say...if it wasn't for chosing Drama in a final " I've got one more option box to fill...Drama or Art" 14 year old decision, I wouldn't even be doing any of this stuff...which is pretty scary considering my life seems to revolve around it now!

What I tend to say is after Uni i'm going to audition for Drama school and if I don't get in then I will do a PGCE and be a drama teacher, which is pretty much my plan, and sounds slightly less pretentious I guess. But then being a member of Bench Theatre...has made me realise that it doesn't have to be about the fame and being recognised, at the end of it it comes down to the basics, passion for performing and working with amazing, talented people to put on productions...it also shows there is more to it than just learning your lines and going on stage/screen...take for example last Sunday and we had the get-in for Seafarer, the majority of cast and crew were at the theatre at 08.00, setting up for a tech rehearsal, we don't have people who work at the theatre who do it for us...we do everything ourselves, get up ladders changing lights, Painting set, building set, setting lights and sound...I mean hell...I even found myself at the top of a 'just-been-made' set of wooden steps using huge power tools to drill in nails and screws and all kind of scary things...and its times like that that I think that it doesn't have to be about the big stuff, it's more about the sense of achievement you feel when you've spent a 13 hour day preparing for a show which is met with such high appreciation from the audience...and you're doing what you love with people that you love (cos lets be honest they are all pretty lovely ;]) .....

(still if a hollywood contract pops up anytime soon thats not to suggest that I'd turn it down...in fact..I would quite appreciate it......anyone......?)

Loves xx