"Tasmins concentration has left the building..."

Despite the fact I was very proud earlier of the fact I ACTUALLY went to the Uni library and ACTUALLY printed off things to read before my massive essay writing mission I am about to undertake like an intelligent student that knows what they are doing..There are many things I should be doing right now...

• Reading up on my essay...
• Writing my essay...
• Writing my actors book...
• Job searching...(still staying at Lloyds but need more hours man!)

Like I said...SHOULD...be doing, but I'm not...obviously, I'm doing everything in my power to distract myself from doing any of the above...'Tidying my room', sorting out Christmas presents, ordering free prints of pictures for my ever growing wall collage, writing a blog and waiting for my mum to come back from the shop with chocolate (despite the fact since yesterday I have eaten 2 Wispa Bars, Half a pack of chocolate biscuits, Half a box of Maltesers, a bag of aero bubbles and 4 Kinder suprises [which in all fairness are very small..]) and now...wittering away in a blog. (Okay i've just realised in my quick 'pre-post scan that i've written that twice, but as it backs-up my title..I'll keep it in.)


I dont know what it is that is making it so hard to get motivated at the moment, I think the year has caught up with me, its been absolutely manic (but more of that in what will no doubt be my end-of-year-reflections-30th-December-2011 blog...) but my concentration has hit an all time low, For example, I find myself zoning out when people are talking to me, it's not that I'm being rude or ignorant, I've always been one for a good chit-chat, but I just suddenly find myself drifting off, then I catch myself out and have to snap myself back into it and force eye-contact and say something coherent that forms some kind of response to what they have just said and that is realistic and suggests I have been hanging on to their every word...
Another example of my ever declining lack of concentration is at work, I've suddenly found myself in the habit of repeating everything the customer says...several times, not normally an issue (albeit slightly irritating) - 'cept i still get the order wrong every now and then...hmmm.


There's just been so much going on, but its uni that's wiped me out, there is just so much to think about and consider, I now regret all the times I moaned about A-Level work!!
I am absolutely buzzing for the Christmas holidays, I LOVE uni (okay I know i said slightly different in my last blog but that was a bad week okay?!) but the concept of 3/4 weeks off is just heaven, I'm so excited for some of my favourite people to come home from Uni!! Rachie, Rosie, Sir Eggicus...I cannot wait to see (and in Eggies case ABUSE) them all again - eeeee!


This is a break that's definitely needed for me, as my wise mother once said to me (imagine this being said in a voice just like mine but deeper and not as babyish) "You need to spend less time DOING and more time BEING!" - and I actually see her point, sometimes you can spend so much time doing things and rushing around thinking about too much, that you forget to just spend time relaxing in your own thoughts, and just being - wise words Mumma Halford (you can obviously see where I get my intelligence and words of wisdom from ;] )


Now I'm off to do some of previously mentioned tasks that I should be doing...as soon as I've eaten the phish food ben and jerries that mumma has bought home and finished watching 'I'm a celebrity - coming out'...hmmm one more night off wont hurt...and if my mother complains...well...she did say I should spend less time doing, I'm just following her advice ;) [though i'm sure i wont be feeling so sarky tomorrow when i'm one day closer to my essay deadline and panicking...]


xx